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It may be the world's oldest profession, but that doesn't make it protected under the Constitution. A federal judge in California ruled that there is no fundamental right to prostitution, dismissing a lawsuit that challenged the state's ban exchanging sex for money.

The state claimed that "there is no fundamental right to engage in prostitution or to solicit prostitution" and "any relationship between the prostitute and the client is not expressive association protected by the Constitution," and U.S. District Judge Jeffrey White agreed. You can see his full order dismissing the case here:

What do you get when you combine two feuding porn stores, a re-routed propane hose, a homemade incendiary device, and a one-eyed giant called Mau Mau? One heckuva lawsuit. Because as it turns out, you can't even get a decent explosion out of that. Instead, Mau Mau (nee Mark Fuston) had to pour line fuel leading away from Desire Video, and then ignite the trail.

All of these details, and many colorful others, are included in Desire owner Levi Bussanich's lawsuit against Fuston, Adult Video Only, and its owners over a years-long feud between the two Vancouver, Washington porn stores. That lawsuit, in all its glory, is below:

Several famous authors filed a brief with the Supreme Court, asking it to hear a lawsuit over Google digital book library. Malcolm Gladwell, Margaret Atwood, Yann Martel, Steven Sondheim and others lent their names to the brief, contending Google is guilty of "massive copyright infringement.

The Supreme Court has yet to decide whether it will hear an appeal from the Second Circuit Court's decision, but you can read the authors' arguments in their filing below:

"Labels matter." That's what the California Supreme Court said when reinstituting a class action lawsuit regarding the accuracy of organic labels on food products. The court also said: "Misrepresentations in labeling undermine this signifying function, preventing consumers from correctly identifying the goods and services that carry the attributes they desire while also hampering honest producers' attempts to differentiate their merchandise from the competition."

The ruling allows consumers to bring unfair competition lawsuits in state court if manufacturers or sellers misuse the "organic" designation on food or produce. You can read the full decision below.

This is why we can't have sweet things. Sugar is delicious, but it can kill you. High fructose corn syrup may also be deadly. And the two sweeteners have been locked in a sour legal battle over naming rights and advertising.

Can corn syrup call itself "corn sugar?" Is it "natural?" Do we care? Can you just put it into a 64-ounce soda and give it to me, please? You can see sugar's complaint below.

As the means for music copying and dissemination have expanded, artists and music companies have struggled to assert their copyrights against online music piracy. 

Copyright lawyers have legitimate claims when people illegally download whole albums without paying. However, what about the case where a mom posts a YouTube video of her toddler dancing to Prince's "Let's Go Crazy?" ... Maybe just leave that one alone, lawyers. 

What's become known as the "Dancing Baby" lawsuit just turned into a victory for fair use advocates and a defeat for copyright holders.

The district attorneys of Los Angeles and San Francisco have filed suit against Uber, accusing the ride-sharing company of unlawful business practices.

Among the allegations are that Uber charged customers a misleading "Safe Rides Fee" without providing real background checks on drivers. Uber is also being called to task on "Airport Fee Tolls," charged to UberX customers who traveled to San Francisco International Airport.

What does this suit mean for Californians who use Uber?

The city of Portland, Oregon, filed suit against Uber in state court on Monday, ordering the ride-share company to cease operations until it complies with Portland's laws.

In a press release Monday, the Portland Bureau of Transportation (PBOT) announced its lawsuit, noting that it would ask the court to verify whether Uber was subject to and in violation of Portland's transportation rules and regulations. Commissioner Steve Novick, who oversees PBOT, announced the city is prepared to issue civil and criminal penalties against Uber and its drivers for operating without permits and inspections.

What's Portland's beef with Uber?

Fox Sued Over 'Simpsons' Character; Actor Wants $250M

You might recognize Frank Sivero from such films as "Goodfellas" and "The Godfather Part II." But what about "The Simpsons"?

Sivero apparently recognized himself in a semi-recurring character on Fox's animated television series "The Simpsons." Sivero has filed a $250 million lawsuit against Fox claiming that the character Louie, who has appeared in 16 episodes of the long-running hit show, is based on the character Sivero "developed and played" in the 1990 mob film "Goodfellas."

What's the basis of Sivero's eye-popping lawsuit?

The Seventh Circuit has written a scathing rejection of a "scandalous" class-action settlement by in which a lawyer inserted his father-in-law as a named plaintiff and negotiated a $2 million advance on his fee.

Judge Richard Posner wrote in the opinion (attached below) that the lower court should have heeded dire warning signs. 

"Almost every danger sign in a class action settlement that our court and other courts have warned district judges to be on the lookout for was present in this case," Posner wrote. "The district court approved a class action settlement that is inequitable-- even scandalous."

Lead attorney Paul M. Weiss' agreement was structured to pay him and his co-counsel $11 million. 

Though the settlement was valued at $90 million, the class "could not expect to receive more than $8.5 million from the settlement, given all the obstacles that the terms of the settlement strewed in the path of the class members," Posner wrote.