Greedy Associates - The FindLaw Legal Lifestyle and Career Blog

July 2016 Archives

Practicing law doesn't have to be boring. In fact, it can be downright exciting -- and we're not just talking, "yeah, I just destroyed those negotiations" excitement, we're talking "Holy #$@&! I just used a flaming sledgehammer to destroy a tombstone in the middle of the Super Bowl" exciting.

So, if you want a bit more action in your life, get your resumes ready. As part of our affiliate relationship with Indeed, we're bringing you the coolest, most exciting and adrenaline filled, legal jobs this week.

The bar exam is over -- done, finished, completed, closed, past. If you're lucky, this will be the last time you have to worry about (or even think about) that test ever again.

So, what comes next? Here are five things to do now that you've survived one of the law's greatest crucibles.

Donald Trump isn't getting along with his former ghostwriter, these days. Tony Schwartz, the co-author of Trump's 1987 memoir "The Art of the Deal," has taken to campaigning against the presidential candidate, going on national TV to call him "impulsive and self-centered." The man who helped create the Donald Trump myth is now working actively against it, arguing that Trump is unfit to lead the country and claiming full credit for his famous memoir.

But enough about Trump and Schwartz. In this battle between a bellicose presidential contender and a famous ghostwriter, the best lines are being exchanged by their lawyers.

Lawyer Conned Boss for 14 Years, Built Luxury Homes With 'Earnings'

Ex patent attorney Jason Throne has been ordered to pay fines to the tune of $4.84 million and spend a little under six years in federal prison following 14 years of conning his boss. In a word, the high flying patent attorney billed his employer Hunter Douglas with phony bills and used his wife's name to do it.

This case is a reminder to large firms to conduct thorough due diligence, otherwise you too could find yourself paying for an aerobics instructor's "expertise."

Saul Goodman isn't exactly the type of lawyer most of us aspire to be. Goodman was made famous as the desperate, slimy, and completely endearing attorney in "Breaking Bad." Played by Bob Odenkirk, Goodman was the bumbling accomplice to Walter White's meth-making mastermind. And the character was so popular he got his own spin-off, in the form of "Better Call Saul," a prequel which chronicles the ways a down-on-his-luck lawyer remains very much down on his luck.

But Saul Goodman has become an unlikely inspiration to many lawyers, at least when it comes to advertising. As the Wall Street Journal's Law Blog points out, "Better Call [Me]" has become a recurrent template for attorney advertising.

High-Ranking Law Schools in America's Cheapest Cities

Do you pride yourself in finding the best deals or stretching your dollar out to its limits? Then you might want to take a look at this list showing some of America's "cheapest" cities by living expenses that featured law schools as highly ranked as the University of Texas. It's a list that will surely give you "bang for the buck" types something to think about.

We'll cover some other interesting aspects of the lists here.

You can't throw a Bluebook without hitting a legal podcast, these days. Of course, there's "Serial," last year's breakout hit that explored the murder of Hae Min Lee, earning more than 5 million downloads on iTunes. (Let's not talk about the disappointing second season.) And there's also "More Perfect," an attempt to recapture the "Serial" magic by telling the tales behind some of the Supreme Court's most famous decisions.

But it's not just NPR spin-offs that are proliferating. Plenty of BigLaw firms are jumping on the bandwagon as well.

California Messed Up Its 'Baby Bar' and Traumatized Test Takers

News has gotten out that California's State Bar bungled the administration of its "baby bar" exam, adding to growing list of horror stories and scandals that hound the bar exam experience. This makes you wonder just how bad things can get before a reputation team is hired to burnish the bar exam's image.

In the meantime, those who've taken Cal's baby bar are enjoying a special kind of personal torment as they await the results of the test.

There are plenty of stories out there about lawyers behaving badly -- lawyers who murder, lawyers who are arrested on drug charges, while in court, lawyers who live double lives as prostitutes.

But it's not just attorneys who act out every now and then. There are plenty of judges who can give the worst lawyers a run for their money. Here are just a few, from the FindLaw archives.

Top 3 Cool Legal Jobs This Week: Patent Power

There's the lawyer -- and then there's the Silicon Valley patent lawyer.

Looking through our archives, there seems to be a lack of pieces done on jobs for lawyers who managed to summon the will and dedication to pass the dreaded patent bar. So for this week, as part of our affiliate program with Indeed, we went out to find the coolest patent-related jobs that are taking applications right now.

5 Myths About Law Students and Lawyers That Need to Stop

People tend to think in broad generalities and they can hardly be blamed for it. The public has its stereotypes about every profession, whether it be programmer, teacher, or doctor. As for lawyers, the stereotypes can be flattering at first, and a little annoying later on.

Here are a few generalities about lawyers a lot of people can't seem to shake.

Law Schools That Won't Drown You in Debt Still Exist

If you're worried about law school debt, you should be. If you attend law school, you may or may not end up with your dream job, but you will certainly end up with a monstrous pile of debt. The good news is that there are still schools out there that are graduating JDs without drowning them in loans. A new list from US News reports features the law schools you may want to consider.

We should point out, however, that the grand majority of the schools on the list aren't exactly the top institutions. And in the highly status-conscious world of law, this may be a make-or-breaker for you.

The kids are out of school and you're still stuck working nights and weekends trying to make your billable hours. Sure, you'd much rather spend your days taking the little ones to the beach, instead of sitting through another status call or polishing off a memo, but that's not always possible.

So, lawyers with children, what exactly can you do to deal with the kids over the summer?

You've landed your dream legal job and you're ready to start your career as a superstar lawyer. But, unless you're starting off at the smallest of firms, you're not going to be entering the firm alone.

So how do you make yourself stand out from the rest of your associate cohort? To make an impression on the firm's partners? Here's how.

BigLaw Firm Entices With Extra $100 Monthly Toward Student Loans

The firm of Orrick, Herrington and Sutcliffe announced last Friday something we're hoping will become more standard in the legal community: an extra $100 per month toward student debt.

Like anything, however, there's a catch -- the perk will continue for new associates until they become eligible for their first bonus. Still, who's gonna say no?

A bad boss can make an already difficult job unbearable. An annoying or aggressive coworker can turn every day at the firm into a crucible. But sadly, we're all going to run into terrible bosses and miserable coworkers at some point.

Thankfully, there's more you can do than just gritting your teeth and counting to ten. To help you out, here are our top tips on dealing with problem partners, insupportable support staff, and straight up jerks.

Judge Describes Claimants as Buxom and Gorilla-Like, Keeps Job

Every once in awhile, some low level employee's distasteful description of his customers will blow up in the media. There's the racist slur on a pizza box, or the use of "fatty" as a name on a customer receipt.

We knew this sort of behavior was not exclusive to sales clerks, but we can't help but be a little hurt when we learned that a Social Security administrative law judge in Wisconsin had made similarly intemperate remarks -- at least for his position.

Want to give back to the next generation, to make the world a better place for the youth? You can. And you don't even have to drop out of the law and take up a second career teaching disadvantaged youth in the inner city, despite your love for "Freedom Writers." (Or "Dangerous Minds," or "Stand and Deliver," or "To Sir, With Love," or "Blackboard Jungle," or even "Welcome Back, Kotter.")

There's plenty of ways you can use your J.D. to improve the lives of children. So, as part of our affiliate partnership with Indeed, here are three of this week's coolest, pro-youth legal jobs.

Hulk Hogan's lawyers may have been a bit disingenuous with the court during the Hulk's invasion of privacy lawsuit against Gawker. If you don't remember, Hogan sued Gawker after it published a short video of him having sex with a friend's wife, eventually winning a $140 million judgment against the blog. It was revealed soon after that Hogan's suit had been financed in part by Peter Thiel, the conservative tech billionaire, largely as revenge for Gawker outing Thiel as gay years before.

And now things have gotten even weirder. An investigation into Hogan's lawyers' legal filings shows has found some "sketchy moves" being made before the court in that case.

Reading the Law: Alternate Route to Becoming a Lawyer

Did you know that it's possible for you to become a lawyer without having first earned a J.D. at a law school? It's true. It's called "reading the law" and it's an alternate route that many students have considered when faced with few options, but a real burning need to become an attorney.

Still, it's a tough choice for many to make, and the statistics can be discouraging. Here are a few points you should consider.

Future lawyers, are you jealous of all your non-law friends running around catching Pokemon while you cram for the bar? Don't be. Join them.

The summer's biggest light-hearted cultural phenomenon is the perfect thing for J.D.'s studying for the bar. And no, we're not kidding. Here's why.

Maybe it's the success of 'Hamilton.' Maybe it's fond memories of law revue. Or maybe lawyers are just recognizing the power of the jingle. But whatever it is, something is up.

Everywhere you look these days, a lawyer seems to be singing, whether it's about their new job or the dangers of eating weed. Thankfully, the internet is here, to memorialize it in all its inspiring (or cringe-inducing) glory.

Business-Minded Attorneys Wanted by Startups

New startups are facing complex legal problems that need sharp, business-minded attorneys to help them work through the processes. Small companies trying to make it big are relying ever more on their attorneys to guide them. If you are an entrepreneur at heart, then that attorney could be you.

If You Have a Sadistic Boss, Should You Leave?

As if working in law wasn't tough enough already, now you're at the office facing the prospect of another day of subtle (or not so subtle) verbal abuse from your superiors. You figured that this was part of the tacit hazing-slash-training that came with the new-associate territory. But now you're beginning to wonder: "Is it worth it?"

Calling someone a greedy associate is redundant, right? After all, while some of us were drawn to the law by our unflagging sense of justice and dreams of becoming a modern Atticus Finch, most of us enter the law for a very different reason: our desire for cold, hard cash and lots of it.

If you want to get rich as a lawyer, we don't blame you. Here are our top tips, from the FindLaw archives.

Top 3 Cool Jobs This Week: Putting Your Tax LLM to Use

For those attorneys who braved additional legal training beyond the three years in law school, we've decided to give you guys a little love. Fear not, your LLM may not turn out to be another case of "lawyer losing money."

As part of our affiliate partnership with Indeed, here are this week's three coolest, tax themed legal jobs. For the rest of our lawyer brethren who can't stand tax -- close your eyes and look away. Viewer discretion is advised.

ABA Could Be Stripped of Its Accreditation Powers

According to Inside Higher Ed, the Department of Education's National Advisory Committee on Institutional Quality and Integrity (NACIQI) recommended that the ABA be stripped of its accreditation power for a year.

Call it a sign of the times. With over 200 law education institutions accredited by the organization and extreme law school debt affecting graduates, it was only a matter of time before someone suggested that the national face of the law schools should be looked at with a hard eye.

Law school is a rip-off that will probably leave you in thousands and thousands of dollars of debt. The bar exam is a nightmare, two-to-three days of ritualized torture that should be considered more illegal hazing than an accurate test of who is qualified to practice law.

Why put up with it, when you can just fake being a lawyer instead?

Quinn Emanuel Wants to Pay You $35K to Leave Your Summer Job

Do you dislike your summer firm? If you were to stumble upon a new job offer at the end of the summer, would you jump on it?

Fear not, Quinn Emanuel Urquhart & Sullivan is dangling a $35,000 sign-on bonus for lucky associates who join the QEUS team -- after a summer stint at another firm. Regardless of how other firms might feel about this, it could be a valuable opportunity to young lawyers who aren't in love with the firm they chose for their summer gig.

America is becoming an ever more diverse country, with increasing minority populations and a growing percentage of women in positions of power. But when it comes to the bench, state trial and appellate courts don't reflect the changing face of America, according to a new report by the American Constitution Society. Instead, today's judges look a lot like the judges from a decade, if not a century, ago: white and male.

So, which states have the least diverse judges and in what state courts are parties most likely to see themselves reflected in the judiciary's demographics? Let's take a look.

Some of the Richest Lawyers Are Criminals

Taking a look at Money Inc.'s list of the richest lawyers in the world, you may notice something quite interesting. Did you know that some of America's wealthiest lawyers were either indicted or convicted of some pretty hefty crimes?

Discovery's Shark Week 2016 ended this weekend, taking with it hours of great white attacks, hammerhead attacks, and the rare bull shark-on-crocodile attack. And if you found yourself rooting for the shark in every attack, well, we understand you.

But while our sea-bound friends might be gone for the summer (from TV at least), there are plenty of sharks still swimming proud in the legal industry. For those of you who'd like to join them, here are our top sharky tips, from the FindLaw archives.

Go east, young lawyers! Pretty far east!

As we celebrate our nation's liberation from our evil cross-Atlantic oppressors this July, smart lawyers might want to consider an English invasion of their own. Following Britain's vote to exit the European Union last week, Europe has been in convulsions. Lawmakers are crying foul, the economy is in shambles, and young Britons are up in arms. But if there's one winner in the Brexit vote, it's probably lawyers, who will be needed in droves to make sense out of the coming legal mess.

Live the Dream: Turn Your Legal Internship Into a Job Offer

Congratulations, you've managed to secure yourself a summer internship position at a firm and you're certainly relieved by your good fortune. But already, you're letting yourself fantasize: "Can I work here as a lawyer?"

Yes, you can, but there's a fair bit of luck involved, too. Fortunately, there are a number of things you can do to boost your luck and increase your chances of getting an offer.