Legal Grounds - FindLaw Legal Humor Blog

Legal Grounds - The FindLaw Legal News with an Attitude Blog

A man pulled over for drunken driving had a unique excuse for smelling like booze: a recent dinner of beer-battered fish.

John Przybyla, 75, of Friendship, Wisconsin, was pulled over on suspicion of OWI (operating while under the influence) in October; he also had nine prior OWI offenses on his record. When the arresting deputy approached Przybyla's car, Przybyla allegedly told the deputy that the alcohol smell was due to the beer-battered fish he had eaten.

We can't resist saying that this story smells fishy, but what about the legal meat of the case?

The manufacturers of Comfyballs underwear say that they were denied trademark by the U.S. Patent and Trademark office because the name of their brand is too "vulgar."

Comfyballs is a Norwegian underwear company established in 2013, reports The Telegraph. The company's underwear is designed to reduce heat and restrict movement of a man's testicles as he goes about his daily business. In other words: The company's product purports to live up to the company's name.

What prompted the USPTO to deny Comfyballs' application to register the company name as a trademark?

A senior New Mexico woman is fighting to get back to playing bingo in her local bingo hall, even attempting to enlist the help of New Mexico's attorney general.

Evangeline Shelland, 70, was barred from playing bingo at the Fraternal Order of Eagles club in Alamogordo, New Mexico, nearly two years ago. According to Albuquerque's KRQE-TV, Shelland has spent most of that time fighting tooth and nail to play at the venue she's attended since 1985.

What is legally keeping Shelland from her passion for bingo?

A New York couple made the most of their subway ride on Friday by getting married on the train.

The unorthodox wedding occurred aboard an N-line train traveling from Brooklyn to Manhattan, where Hector Irakliotis, 26, and Tatyana Sandler, 25, tied the knot in front of friends and random commuters. According to the New York Daily News, the train held a special significance for the couple as the backdrop of much of their romantic history.

Can couples actually be married on a subway train?

A naked man fell through the ceiling of a women's bathroom at Boston's Logan Airport on Saturday before allegedly assaulting an elderly man.

The man was identified by police as 26-year-old Boston resident Cameron Shenk, reports The Associated Press. Charges against Shenk for his puzzling airport rampage include attempted murder, mayhem, assault and battery on a police officer, and lewd and lascivious conduct.

How did a naked man end up in the ceiling of the Logan Airport's women's restroom?

"Vape" has been named the Oxford Dictionary's Word of the Year for 2014.

Following in the hallowed footsteps of last year's winner, "selfie," "vape" beat out some fierce competition from other up-and-coming slang terms such as "normcore," "slacktivism," and "budtender" to take this year's title reports CNET. "Vape" acts as both a verb and a noun, describing the act of inhaling and exhaling the vapor produced by an electronic cigarette or vaporizer as well as the vaporizing device itself.

The addition of "vape" into the popular zeitgeist is due in no small part to the legal issues surrounding the burgeoning e-cigarette industry.

Video of a Tennessee man breaking into joyous dancing after making his last alimony payment to his former spouse has generated over 400,000 views since being uploaded to YouTube.

Memphis resident Ed Smith marked the occasion of making his final spousal support payment to his former wife at a local bank with an array of dance moves all caught on video, reports the New York Daily News.

Why was Smith so excited about making his final payment?

A Pennsylvania man with a prior conviction for counterfeiting is accused of trying to pass off fake $20 bills at a yard sale.

Gregory Louis Douglas, 40, was allegedly using the counterfeit currency at a yard sale run by Amy Miller of Rayburn, Pennsylvania -- a woman who also works as a bank teller. As Trib Total Media reports, Miller found that the bills Douglas had given her didn't have the security features or the "feel" of genuine U.S. currency.

What kind of charges will Douglas face for his alleged yard sale fraud?

A New York hotel is being sued in federal court for allegedly losing one couple's beloved 2-year-old cat.

Jeffrey and Shoshanah Johnson stayed at the Residence Inn by Marriott in Central Islip with their cat Cotton back in July. According to their suit, Cotton went missing from their room and was later recovered by another guest. What followed is a dizzying chain of allegations concerning Cotton's custody, with Cotton's present location still a mystery.

Do the Johnsons have any kind of a legal case against the hotel for Cotton's disappearance?

An Alabama man accused of robbing four Subway sandwich shops with a gun told police he was angry because the chain's "Jared Diet" hadn't worked for him.

Jared Fogle is a spokesperson for Subway who claims that the restaurants sandwiches helped him accomplish a dramatic weight loss. 18-year-old Zachary Torrance apparently failed to see similar results. "He stated in the course of his interview he had tried the 'Jared Diet' and it hadn't worked for him like he thought it should have," Hueytown Police Chief Chuck Hagler told WJBF-TV. "He was trying to get his money back."

Torrance may now end up trying a different sort of diet: the prison cafeteria diet.