Legal Grounds: stupid criminals Archives
Legal Grounds - The FindLaw Legal News with an Attitude Blog

Recently in stupid criminals Category

Certain TV shows are known for ripping their plotlines straight from the headlines. And sometimes it goes the other way around. In a story reminiscent of AMC's "Breaking Bad," an Indiana pastor plead guilty to producing almost 100 tons of synthetic marijuana, and using his church as a multimillion-dollar drug trafficking operation.

And that's before you get to the crooked married cop couple, the former traveling clown running for state legislature, and the connections to the imprisoned former head of Jared Fogle's foundation.

Xanax Delivered to School in a Doughnut Prompts Arrests

Recently, a young man dropped off lunch for a high-school senior, leaving a bag with a doughnut in the main office. This unusual dedication to dining seemed strange to Bordentown Regional High School authorities, who searched the dessert and called the cops.

Indeed, inside a small plastic bag stuffed in the doughnut were 6 Xanax pills, reports UPI. Xanax, known by the generic name of alprazolam, is medicine, legitimately prescribed to people with anxiety and panic disorders. But as you can see, it is also used illegally and recreationally.

Stolen Taco Truck Hits School Bus in California Getaway

Crime does not pay, especially when you steal a taco truck and hit a school bus during your getaway. Then you just end up in a shooting. Specifically, you end up shot at by police and the saga ends with you in the hospital.

This is the true story of Sean Fowler, 20, and Daiquon Horne, 22, who stole a taco truck in San Bernardino on Monday morning, according to the city's local paper, The Sun. Although neither was struck by police bullets, the young men are reportedly in the hospital and will no doubt be charged criminally for their failed escapade.

We've all had one of those Friday nights, right? The ones that leave you a bit woozy on Saturday morning? Lucky for most of us, we don't have to go to work early on a Saturday morning.

Not so for Rochester City Court Judge Leticia Astacio, who was on her way to Saturday morning arraignments when she was ticketed for driving while intoxicated at 8 a.m.

Ah yes, the "the beer-battered fish did it" defense. A classic legal ruse. Only this time, the jury didn't bite.

76-year-old Wisconsinite John Przybyla was convicted of his 10th OWI (operating while intoxicated is the state's version of a DUI) this week, when a jury rejected his claim that he had been intoxicated by eating beer-battered fish. I guess when you see the "my body is a brewery" defense work, you're willing to try anything.

Drunk Parents Did Not Drive, Gave Wheel to Child

We all know we are not supposed to drive drunk anymore, as Helen Mirren's Super Bowl ad for Budweiser reminded us in no uncertain terms. "The collective we are dumbfounded that people still drive drunk," Mirren said.

But what should the "collective we" make of a Wisconsin couple that allowed their 9-year-old-daughter to drive them and an 11-month-old baby because they were too drunk to drive? The couple pled not guilty to charges of reckless endangerment of a child last week, Reuters reports, and indeed no one was hurt.

If you've pled not guilty to vehicular manslaughter, googling "How do fugitives escape?" while out on bail sure doesn't make you look innocent. But millionaire Sean Ludwick probably has bigger things to worry about right now than how he looks. Namely, whether he'll ever get out of prison again after a judge was alerted to his actions and denied him bail.

And if Ludwick is adding to his Things-Not-to-Do-When-Charged-With-a-Crime list, perhaps he should add, "Try and buy a boat from an off-duty FBI agent in Puerto Rico."

If you're going to have sex with your high school teacher, you probably want to get it on tape. After all, your friends might not believe you if you just told them. So maybe you record it on your cell phone and share it with a few or eleven of your friends.

This would actually be a bad idea. Because, unless you had the teacher's permission to tape the encounter, you may have just committed a felony. And that teacher might sue you.

Ever been tagged in a less-than-flattering Facebook photo? If so, you can imagine Donald A. "Chip" Pugh's pain when police posted the Ohio man's mugshot to social media: "They put a picture that made me look like I was a Thundercat or something."

We feel you, Chip. And we probably would've done the same thing and sent the police department a better looking selfie.

When 19-year-old Sarah Furay was arrested after police found 31.5 grams of cocaine, 126 grams of marijuana, 29 ecstasy tablets, 60 doses of a drug similar to LSD, and methamphetamine in her apartment, she took a smiling mug shot and was dubbed the "World's Most Adorable Drug Kingpin." When it was discovered that she was the daughter of a DEA agent, the story looked even more like a farce.

But after spending just one day in jail and posting what appears to be a minimal bond amount, many are questioning whether she's receiving preferential treatment and may walk on the drug charges altogether.