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Justice Is Served: Brawling Florida Judge Is off the Bench

Some say that criminal court is where bad people are on their best behavior and civil court is where good people are on their worst behavior. So what are we to make of a criminal court judge who brawls with public defenders, forces defendants to appear without counsel, and totally loses his cool when an accused individual chooses to exercise his constitutional rights?

The Florida Judicial Qualifications Committee and the state's Supreme Court both considered the question, reviewing Brevard County Judge John C. Murphy's actions and reaching two very different conclusions. Spoiler alert: justice prevailed.

DIY Cardboard License Plate Won't Fly With Cops

Maybe in your youth you had a good fake identification that allowed you to get into bars when you were underage. It seemed cool, but actually it was a crime -- passing off a document or item as government-issued is against the law.

Now a woman in New York State has taken fakery (and custom plates) to the next level with a homemade license plate made of cardboard and markers.

"21 Jump Street." "Never Been Kissed." "17 Again." There are plenty of movies about adults sneaking back in to high school, whether to fight crime, research a story, or relive the past. But what about if you're a foreign national? And what if it's not a movie?

John Harris High School in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania found out this week that one of its star students was in fact a 23-year-old Ukrainian man who had been posing as an American student for almost four years. I don't think he'll be getting his diploma.

Google is notoriously secretive regarding its proprietary search algorithms. Uber Technologies is eager to become the most used ride sharing service. And Gainesville, Florida company Uber Promotions just wants to protect its local trademark.

The solution to this legal conundrum? Tell Uber to make sure anyone living in Gainesville and googling "Uber Gainesville phone" gets the phone number for Uber Promotions and not Uber Technologies' local contact number. Wait, what?

If you're going to have sex with your high school teacher, you probably want to get it on tape. After all, your friends might not believe you if you just told them. So maybe you record it on your cell phone and share it with a few or eleven of your friends.

This would actually be a bad idea. Because, unless you had the teacher's permission to tape the encounter, you may have just committed a felony. And that teacher might sue you.

Gold, frankincense, and myrrh are nothing compared to some dank Purple Kush or sticky Strawberry Cough. So while the Biblical Magi may have been kind to baby Jesus, the volunteers for Cannabis Can were the real heroes when they gave free joints to Denver's homeless for Christmas.

We're not sure whether those joints contained some sweet, sweet Sour Diesel or fuzzy Super Silver Haze, but we're pretty sure the presents were appreciated. "Merry Christmas and a puff puff, New Year's," one woman told volunteers while accepting a joint.

To some, Gollum was "a small slimy creature," bent by obsession and greed. To others, he was a tortured soul whose tragic corruption ultimately leads to victory. While most are free to disagree about one of J. J. R. Tolkien's more notorious characters, not so for Bilgin Ciftci, who faces two years in a Turkish prison for comparing the country's president to the twisted fictional being.

If Gollum is a bad guy, Ciftci could be guilty of "insulting a public official;" if he's a good guy, Ciftci could beat the charge. So who decides?

Can the KKK Adopt a Highway?

November is National Adoption Month. Dating couples are adopting dogs; married couples are adopting children; spinsters are taking in a few dozen more cats; and the Ku Klux Klan is trying to adopt a stretch of highway in north Georgia.

The Klan is excited about adding a one-mile span of Route 515 to its family, and filled out the proper adoption paperwork. But these things take time, and the approval of the Georgia Supreme Court.

Pastafarian Wins Right to Wear Spaghetti Strainer in MA License Photo

While the world is burning over deeply held religious beliefs, one woman in Massachusetts has succeeded in her quest for official respect for her farcical faith, Pastafarianism. Her driver's license photo will reflect the religion's creed by showing her with a spaghetti strainer, according to the Boston Globe.

It sounds absurd, perhaps, but given the international uproar over religious headdress in official identifications in recent years, the spaghetti strainer was an important symbolic win for Lindsay Miller and Pastafarians. The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is a parody but not anti-religion, and she says she did have other women of faith in mind when she first sought a license wearing a spaghetti strainer.

Salem, Massachusetts is famous for its witch trials. And now the world's most famous warlock is subject to an order of protection after being sued in Salem by a witch priestess. Lori Bruno-Sforza owns a witchcraft store in Salem and claims to be descended from a long line of witches. She also claims that Christian Day, who also owns occult stores in Salem and New Orleans and self-describes as "the world's best-known warlock," has been harassing her for the last three years, over the phone and on social media.

On Wednesday, a Salem judge ruled in Sforza's favor, ordering Day not to contact her or come within 100 yards of her home or business for a year.