Legally Weird: Dumb Crime Archives
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A Florida man allegedly faked having a heart attack inside a Walmart store to allow his accomplice to make off with almost $400 worth of toys, including a motorized Power Wheels Barbie car.

According to police, 30-year-old Tarus Scott and 27-year-old Genard Dupree were captured on surveillance video walking through the Walmart store in Lake Wales, Florida, filling a cart with items. As the two approached the store's exit, Dupree reportedly began clutching his chest as if he was suffering a heart attack, reports Tampa's WFLA-TV.

As other shoppers rushed to Dupree's aid, Scott took the opportunity to make his way out of the store with a cart full of expensive toys without paying.

Three University of Vermont (UVM) students are accused of stealing, killing, and eating a frat house's chicken.

UVM police allege that Cameron Dube, Darien Newman, and Hannah Jackman, all 18, snuck into the Alpha Gamma Rho frat house in Burlington, Vermont, snatched a chicken, then killed, plucked, and ate it. The students were originally facing trespass and theft charges, but the Burlington Free Press reports that the three chicken snatchers have been "referred to the university's reparative board."

What's the deal with this fowl deed?

A Maryland high school student was arrested after giving his teacher a brownie laced with pot.

The unsuspecting Anne Arundel County high school teacher was taken to the nurse's office and an ambulance was called after she reported feeling ill and acting disoriented. According to Baltimore's WJZ-TV, a 17-year-old student admitted to giving his teacher a piece of the brownie, which he confirmed contained pot.

What criminal charges is this teen facing for giving his teacher a "magic" brownie?

A Washington couple came home from a weekend trip to find that their furniture had been swapped out for furniture they didn't recognize.

The couple also found a collection of empty beer bottles and pizza boxes inside their apartment, reports The News Tribune. The receipt inside the pizza box included the name and information of one of the culprits. A traffic ticket also left behind included both the name and the address of the second alleged furniture swapper.

Conveniently enough for police, the address listed on the traffic ticket was right next door.

A man accused of using a McDonald's McChicken sandwich to hit his pregnant wife is facing a domestic violence charge.

Moody foody Marvin Tramaine Hill II, 21, told police in Des Moines, Iowa, that he threw the breaded chicken sandwich at his wife "because he doesn't like them." According to The Des Moines Register, Hill claims that his wife was actually the one who assaulted him.

Is the McChicken now the official sandwich of domestic squabbles?

A "banana gun" was cause of a Colorado felony arrest for allegedly pointing the intimidating fruit at officers.

Nathen Rolf Channing, 27, was arrested for felony menacing near Grand Junction, Colorado, for allegedly drawing and pointing a banana at officers "in the same manner someone would draw a standard handgun from a concealed holster," reports Denver's KUSA. Channing claims that he was simply joking, but the cops didn't seem amused.

Can pointing a "banana gun" get you slapped with a felony?

An Iowa woman is facing drug charges after police helped her regain entry into her locked apartment and allegedly found a miniature marijuana operation inside.

Jailin A. Turner, 19, was charged possession of a controlled substance, possession of drug paraphernalia, failure to affix drug tax stamp, and disorderly house. That last charge is likely due to allegations that when police arrived at Turner's house early Friday morning she was "yelling and kicking the window," reports the Iowa City Press-Citizen.

How did a lock-out turn into a drug bust?

A Florida man proved to himself (and all of us) that you can fit a chainsaw in your pants, but you might have to deal with a theft charge.

Police arrested Anthony Ballard, 28, on suspicion of shoplifting a chainsaw from the Treasure Coast Lawn Equipment store in Port St. Lucie, Florida. Despite all those sharp metal bits near his nethers, Ballard allegedly made it out of the store and dumped the power tool in a wooded lot before escaping. But as reported by TCPalm, police have some interesting surveillance video in their possession.

What happened after this feat of chainsaw pocketing, and what does Ballard face in court?

A Florida woman is facing aggravated battery charges for allegedly stabbing her boyfriend to protect her pet turtle.

Marie Seymour, 53, was taken into police custody on Tuesday, while her boyfriend was taken to a Palm Beach Gardens hospital. According to the Palm Beach Post, Seymour is accused of stabbing her boyfriend after a drunken threat that he was going to "harm her turtle."

Is there a legal defense available for this reptile lover?

A New York mom has been arrested for allegedly plotting to have her daughter's ex killed and fed to alligators.

Melisa Schonfield, 57, was arrested Friday after meeting with an undercover detective who she believed was her murder-for-hire contact. According to ABC News, Schonfield allegedly tried to hire Det. Dave Pustizzi to kill Ernesto Negrillo, the Florida baby daddy of her 2-year-old granddaughter. In addition to allegedly wanting Negrillo killed, Schonfield thought it best that her contract killer dispose of Negrillo's body by feeding it to alligators.

What kind of charges are pending for this alleged alligator murder-for-hire mom?