Block on Trump's Asylum Ban Upheld by Supreme Court
As a public service to Hollywood, we decided to come up with 10 ideas for lawyer TV shows that aren't any worse than what's on TV right now. (By the way, we expect to see a check in the mail come pilot season.)
1. "Serve and Protect."
By day, the main character is a tough-as-nails New York City cop. By night, he's a tough-as-nails waiter in a hipster Brooklyn gastropub. "No, you can't sub kale chips for truffle-infused tater tots! Not on my watch!"
2. "Pro Hac Vice."
A traveling lawyer goes from place to place, fighting for the rights of the downtrodden when no one else will. It's like if "Knight Rider" were about a lawyer -- and there were no awesome talking car. (The joke only works if you pronounce "Vice" as in "Miami Vice." Get it?)
3. "Judge 001."
The adventures of humanity's first robot judge, which is programmed with the knowledge of every Supreme Court justice who ever lived. And thanks to a John Roberts subroutine, it can fill in as the umpire for the kids' little league game.
4. "The Socratic Method."
The story of several sexy young law students in their first years of law school. The catch is they're all in Ancient Greece and Socrates is actually their professor.
5. "Res Ipsa Loquitur."
The trials and tribulations of a first-year associate at a big law firm -- and his ventriloquist dummy.
6. "Spirit of the Law."
It's the year 2057, and Justice Ginsburg's grandson, Louis Brandeis Ginbsurg, is a justice on the Supreme Court. When he's in a particular jurisprudential quandary (which happens every week), he talks to the spirit of his grandmother, who appears in her customary jabot.
7. "Fashion Police: Legal Edition."
In this special themed edition of "Fashion Police," Melissa Rivers critiques trial lawyers' fashion sense, while a panel of lawyers critiques their advocacy style.
8. "Patently Offensive."
One's an uptight, fastidious patent attorney. The other's a messy slob of a copyright attorney. How could they possibly be roommates?!
9. "White Shoe Diaries."
Attempting to piggyback on the success of "Mad Men," this drama about a law firm in the 1950s features exactly as much sexism and day-drinking. Except they're lawyers.
10. "Circuit Split."
Two federal appellate judges, once married to each other, have gotten a divorce. For some reason, they still have to live in the same house. With both of them under one roof, how wacky can it get?!