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If you want a fight, take up boxing. Go to a country bar. Play a video game. Find a sibling. Hit yourself in the head.
Just don't call 911 looking for a fight. No, not even if you're drunk and you have some lingering anti-police aggression. And definitely not if you're a sex offender with a long criminal record.
When John Pacella of Willowbrook, Ill. didn't heed this advice, he landed himself a cozy spot in the DuPage County Jail.
Pacella, who is no stranger to local police, called 911 earlier this month and asked to fight a police officer, reports the Chicago Tribune. A confused operator sent officers to investigate the 4 a.m. call.
John Pacella wasn't kidding.
When officers arrived, he shoved them and tried to start a fight. He was promptly arrested.
One supposes that both Pacella and the officers were asking for it.
The 911 fighter has since been charged with aggravated battery, resisting a police officer, and battery with intent to provoke -- all felonies. He's also being held on $100,000 bail, according to the Chicago Tribune.
He's having a hard time coming up with the cash.
Which makes one wonder why he would call 911 looking for a fight.
John Pacella clearly has no money; he's been convicted of indecent solicitation of a 14-year-old child; and he remains on the Illinois sex offender registry. He may also still be on probation and he probably just lost his low-paying job.
Was he trying to further ruin his life?