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It's never fun to get turned down for a job. Jevons Brown, a 58-year-old veteran in St. Louis, had a particularly rough time with the constant rejection.
To exact revenge, he mailed cat poop -- a lot of cat poop -- to companies that didn't hire him.
Though hailed as a hero among dejected commoners, Brown faced criminal consequences for his feisty feline foible.
The Great Cat Poopetrator
Brown sent the packages of cat poop via the U.S. mail. Investigators were able to sniff out 20 packages containing cat poop and link them to Brown, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch reports.
Those of you wondering what the legal hoopla is all about: mailing poop is against the law because it's a health hazard. Brown was sentenced to two years of probation after pleading guilty to a misdemeanor charge of mailing injurious articles.
"This is not a victimless crime," Assistant U.S. Attorney John Bodenhausen said in court. The victims included postal workers, people whose mail was adjacent to Brown's packages, and the employees who received the pungent packages, according to the Post-Dispatch.
Sentencing Factors: Pitying the Poopetrator
Courts typically grant probation for first-time or low-risk offenders. Statutes determine when probation is possible, but it is up to the sentencing judge to determine whether or not to actually grant probation.
Federal sentencing guidelines recommended probation or up to six months in prison for Brown's doody deed. The judge opted for two years probation.
Judges will typically consider certain "aggravating" or "mitigating" circumstances to determine where along the prescribed spectrum a defendant's punishment should fall.
Lighter sentences are often imposed on defendants who are "first-time" offenders, who committed the crime under great personal stress, and who seem genuinely remorseful.
The court apparently took pity on Brown, a veteran who reportedly grew frustrated with his lack of employment opportunities and lashed out at employees of companies that failed to hire him. It also helped that Brown had no prior arrest record and in court, vowed, "I'm sorry. This will never happen again."
So the next time you get rejected for a job, don't eye the litter box.