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If there's anything better than Spring Break, it's videos of bros acting a fool at Spring Break, then local police departments posting those videos to their Facebook page along with said bro's arrest warrant and a request to turn himself in. It's a seasonal ritual not unlike the first cherry blossoms or the salmon returning to Capistrano.
And so we salute Kameron, the Spring Break bro who acted a fool by launching a football at a Gulf Shores Police Department SUV on the beach. And we toast the Gulf Shores Police Department, who posted video of the pinpoint bomb, along with Kameron's name and the warrant that has been issued for his arrest.
"F*** the Police!"
What we have is the perfect play, in three parts. In Act I, our protagonist, faced with the invading force of no chill represented by the police department's incursion onto the party beach, must decide whether to shrink from the moment or lead his people to victory.
In one ear, the populace cries for his help: "F*** the police! F*** the police!" his people implore. But should he f*** the police? They are far away, and he is quite probably intoxicated. Could he not just ignore the police? It is too late -- the football is in his hands, the glory a gleam in his eye, and lo, he must fulfill his destiny:
When the cops show up to Gulf Shores... pic.twitter.com/ERR1QnBTxa-- ?MATT HERRERA? (@TheMattHerrera) March 16, 2016
Don't F*** the Police
In Act II, the police refuse to take this f***ing lying down. They turn to social media, tracking down their attacker's Twitter profile and calling our hero to task and blowing up his dang spot on Facebook:
That appears to be a valid warrant, charging Kameron With a K with harassment. Alabama's criminal statutes make harassment a class C misdemeanor, which could mean three months in jail and up to $500 in fines for our Spring Break bro.
Act III comes courtesy of Sarah Wall at Fox 10 News in Mobile, Alabama:
Whether our hero will add to that total remains to be seen. But we agree with the Gulf Shores PD -- great arm, bro.